Is someone in your team navigating the 'Grey Divorce'? Here's how you can help

There is a new trend taking workers over the age of 50 by storm and sadly it is not a new found love of pickleball. Just when older workers think they have life all sorted out – along comes the rise of the ‘grey divorce’.

It appears that some older couples are choosing to end their marriages and enter into a new phase of life that requires support, flexibility and empathy from their employers. Let’s be honest, divorce over 50 is not on anyone's bingo card, yet it is becoming increasingly prevalent impacting work performance, mental health and financial security.

What is the ‘grey divorce’?

You may not have heard the term before, but ‘grey divorce’ refers to the dissolution of marriages among older adults, typically those aged 50 and above. This trend has been on the rise, with divorce rates among this age group more than doubling since 1990. In fact, one in four divorces falls into this category. It appears that instead of planning a shared retirement or an exciting river cruise – many older Australians are heading to the divorce court and changing societal norms.

Why is the grey divorce prevalent?

The question on everyone’s lips is why is this happening? Why are our baby boomers and Gen X’s not living the perceived ‘happily ever after’? Well, research indicates that there are four clear reasons that contribute to the grey divorce.

1. Longer life expectancies: People are living longer, healthier lives, which means they have more time to reconsider their life choices, including their marriages.
2. Changing social norms: The stigma surrounding divorce has decreased significantly, making it more socially acceptable for older adults to end their marriages if it no longer meets their needs.
3. Empty nest syndrome: Many couples find that once their children leave home, they no longer have common interests or goals and this can lead to a reassessment of their relationship. There is also no longer the guilt of needing to stay together for the kids.
4. Financial Independence: With more women in the workforce in their own careers enjoying greater financial independence, older adults are feeling more empowered to leave unsatisfactory marriages.

6 ways employers can support employees through the ‘grey divorce’

It may seem like a personal problem, but it is unwise for employers to view this phenomenon as something that their employees should deal with in their own time. Just like other key life events, it will require support, flexibility and understanding. Here are six ways employers can step up and be there when it counts.

1. Create a supportive environment: Foster a workplace culture that emphasises empathy and support. Encourage open communication and ensure employees feel comfortable discussing their personal challenges without fear of judgment or repercussions.
2. Offer flexible work arrangements: Divorce proceedings and related activities can be time-consuming and emotionally draining. Providing flexible work hours or remote work options can help employees manage their personal and professional responsibilities more effectively. It can also help workers to have the ability to take a breath and juggle all of the important balls effectively.
3. Provide access to employee assistance programs (EAPs): EAPs can offer valuable counselling and support services to employees going through a divorce. These programs can help employees cope with the emotional and psychological stress associated with divorce. Helping employees to access this important service also takes the pressure off of leaders to navigate this difficult employee time.
4. Financial education and support: Divorce can have significant financial implications, especially for older adults nearing retirement. Employers can offer financial planning workshops or access to financial advisors to help employees navigate the financial complexities of divorce.
5. Promote mental health resources: Encourage employees to take advantage of mental health resources that the organisation offers, such as meditation or  stress management programs. Mental health support can be crucial in helping employees maintain their well-being during and after a divorce.
6. Adjust workloads and expectations: It is important to recognise that employees going through a divorce may experience decreased productivity and increased absenteeism. This is to be expected, and employers are encouraged to be flexible with deadlines and workloads and consider temporary adjustments to their responsibilities to reduce stress. Employers can access our resource "Managing performance when employees experience difficult times” for further support.

The impact of the ‘grey divorce’ on work performance

There is no question that the grey divorce can have a profound impact on an employee's work performance. The emotional and psychological stress of divorce can lead to decreased concentration, lower productivity, and increased absenteeism. Employees may also experience physical health issues, such as insomnia or anxiety, which can further affect their job performance.

Additionally, the financial strain of divorce can cause significant stress, potentially leading to presenteeism, where employees are physically present but mentally distracted. It is important for employers to remember that divorce usually carries a lot of grief and workers would prefer not to be under the strain of divorce. However, understanding these potential impacts can help employers provide the necessary support to mitigate these effects, ensure the wellbeing of workers and maintain a productive work environment.

Step up and show up

The grey divorce may be a common and well-travelled road, but it is a journey that no one wants to find themselves on. It can be financially and emotionally crippling, challenging workers in a way that they never anticipated. For some, there is shame and sadness and for others there is frustration and angst. Either way, this life transition is going to be a hurdle to the day-to-day work life of the employee.

This generates an opportunity for employers to step up and show up by providing the support, flexibility and adjustments needed to navigate this difficult period. Sure, this may prove challenging in the short term, but no storm lasts forever and when the sun begins to once again shine, employees will be fiercely loyal and grateful to the employer that had the patience to walk beside them.

Further information

For assistance with your workplace matters, Members of Ai Group can contact us or call our Workplace Advice Line on 1300 55 66 77 for further information.